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The Blessing of Tears
January 31, 2012“Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted .” (Matthew 5:4)
Perhaps you’ve noticed that from time to time (!) I don’t get to preach my third point. Well, it happened again last Sunday. I never got to the question “Why is it a blessing to mourn?”
Because many of us grew up with the adages “Big boys don’t cry” and “Keep a stiff upper lip,” there is a hesitation in today’s majority culture (although not necessarily in some of the ethnic cultures) for men—and even women—to cry. Often people “choke back” tears or “get by themselves” when they feel like crying. When they can do neither, they feel embarrassed—even ashamed.
That is why it’s important for us Jesus followers to ask the question, “Why is a blessing to mourn?” In my reflections on the second beatitude, I’ve thought of three reasons why mourning can be considered a blessing.
First, mourning reveals our values. Sadness, grief, sorrow, and mourning are all expressions of feeling the loss of something or someone important to us. I may not grieve over a single hair that comes out when I brush my hair, but I’d probably wail if they all came out at once. The Gospels record three times when Jesus wept: at the tomb of his friend Lazarus (John 11:35), after entering Jerusalem on Palm Sunday (Luke 19:41), and on the eve of his crucifixion (Matthew 26:37-38). In each case he was mourning the impact of sin and death on those he loved.
Second, mourning reveals a tender heart. It is only a hard heart that is unmoved by trouble or regret. Sensitive hearts are troubled by sin (2 Corinthians 7:10) and suffering (Luke 10:33). John Stott was absolutely correct when he wrote: “There are such things as Christian tears, and too few of us ever weep them.”
Lastly, mourning fosters relationships. The Bible teaches that I cannot draw near to God without humbling myself in repentance (James 4:6-10). However, it also promises that, if I do “change [my] laughter to mourning and [my] joy to gloom, [God] will “lift [me] up” (another way of saying he will comfort me). Further, believers are to “weep with those who weep” (Romans 12:15). Tears are acid that breaks down walls. Let’s not be afraid to cry.
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